Gah I’ve become one of those sappy mothers who says she wants her children to stop growing….I never understood that thought before having my second child. I was too concerned with my first born meeting all his milestones and being delayed in this area or that. It just took having another baby (no big deal) to realize it’s all going to be okay and that this phase of my life and theirs is going by so incredibly fast. Though that last statement is true, I’m a more relaxed and sentimental mom… now having two children I have double the worry and anxiety. This is something I’m very aware of and trying to combat. I don’t want my life ruled by my fears, which include by not limited to terrorism, flying, cancer, kidnapping, and car crashes. Sheesh I sound so paranoid now, what happened to my carefree college-aged self? I do know the answer to that as well. I grew up, I’ve seen life happen to people around me, I’ve seen the good and the bad, but I have focused on the bad. Our brains have a very keen way of doing that, holding onto negative thoughts. I think are brain defaults to focusing on the bad. Well It took me a trip to my doctors office and one anti-anxiety prescription for flying (which I have yet to decide if I’ll actually take), to open my Bible and devotional “Choose Joy” by Kay Warren to see what God has to say about this anxiety of mine. It comes down to it that trust and worry can’t exist in the same space. I have not been trusting. Here’s what I read: Matthew 6:33-34 “Steep you life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes” (MSG). It’s a simple and as complex as this: turn my fears into trusting God’s ultimate plan for my life, to trust that whatever happens in my life He will equip me with the things I need to endure, to believe that my future is good. I want to side note this with the very real fact that anxiety has a biological and physiological component to it and sometimes in order to cope, medication is needed for a period of time. I have four flights scheduled in March and you better believe I’ll have my prescription in my back pocket if needed. There is no shame in that and the more I accept what is going on inside me and outside in the world PEACE becomes my friend again.
PS. There’s nothing like a beautiful Moses Basket to help you chart the growth of your baby. I’m so glad I found this one by Plum + Sparrow. Cue all the sentimental feels now.