Ideas sometimes come to me at odd times…. like after a night of wrestling with my 13 month old baby. Yeah I said it, I was WRESTLING her at intermittent times throughout the night; soothing her with my worn out nipples and then unsuccessfully unlatching them from her tiny mouth only to start the cycle again. Nurse – rescue my sore boobs – wake – scream (on both our parts) – wresting – wake. So it’s a funny thing that I thought of creating a “tired mom’s kit” in my exhausted state, but I did and I hope it brings you or some other tired mom joy as they read this, because when you’re this tired you deserve a new mug that says “mom” ha ha.
It’s clearly time for Sam and I to start sleep training Ruby. She’s has 13 wonderful months of sleeping in our bed and nursing on demand; but given our current state of affairs I’m sensing that it’s time to let her soothe herself. It’s actually my job as her mother to teach her this. In the words of my sleep coach Alyssa Blask Campbell from Seed & Sew, “she cries because she’s pissed you’re not nursing her because that’s all you’ve ever taught her.” It’s my job to comfort my child, it’s also my job to teach her that she can soothe herself and find a new way to fall back to sleep. I hold onto that thought when I hear her cry and resist the urge to subject my nipples to more torture….have I said nipples a lot already? I think this might be the most I’ve ever written about nipples ha! Well I’m sure you get the point here, the girls are on strike at night!
Anyways I’ll be sharing more about how we sleep train Ruby in the next couples weeks because honestly we haven’t figured it all out yet. We have decided that we will not do the baby alligator wrestling thing with her anymore. When she wants to nurse at night I will commit to putting her back in her crib to teach her she CAN fall asleep there by herself and we will comfort her crib side.
Here is our sleep plan:
- Put Ruby to bed in crib and rub her back to soothe her. Sometimes we rock her to sleep and let her fall asleep in our arms before placing her in the crib.
- Have Sam (dad) soothe and comfort her crib side to teach her she can sleep all night in her crib while telling her she is okay.
- Play sleep music from the Head Space app or turn on the “Dohm” sound machine when she’s sleeping or falling asleep.
Full Disclosure: when she is teething, in pain or sick I still nurse her at night because I feel like that’s one of the benefits of being about to breastfeed but on the nights that she isn’t in pain or sick I know she needs to learn how to soothe herself and fall back asleep.
Here are some fun things that every tired mom should have, including but not limited to the best concealer I’ve found, a mom tumbler and mug to remind you that having children was the best decision you’ve ever made, a jumpsuit so you don’t have to think about pairing pants with a top and more.
Cheers mama, you’re doing a good job!
xo and Godspeed,